Twelve Chefs by Daniil Kharms


One more thing to toss out today! Recently devoted an entire issue of their publication, The Thin Journal, to the late absurdist Leningrad author, Daniil Kharms, best known for his mini-stories. One of the odder, more eccentric figures of 20th Century Russian / Soviet literature, Kharms made a living as a children’s writer (even though he apparently disliked children) since none of his adult writing was ever published during his lifetime.  In the spirit of, I present to you a translation of Twelve Chefs, a very short children’s story by D. Kharms:

I state that their are twelve chefs drawn on this page. However, they keep telling me that only one of them is a chef, that the rest aren’t chefs. Yet, if the rest aren’t chefs, than who the devil are they?

For more information on Daniil Kharms, and more of his work, check out



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